Skin Toxicology—The Future May Be Orange

By: Johann Wiechers, PhD, JW Solutions

Posted: July 9, 2010

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Now imagine a toxicologist standing at the edge of this swimming pool, stating “Sir, I do not think it is wise to jump into this pool. I have performed my calculations and I can assure you that it is dangerous to jump into this swimming pool filled with orange paint." If the skin penetration of the paint was 0.1%, the swimmer would absorb 10 kg of orange paint into his skin and be orange for the rest of his life.

Taking this theoretical but admittedly ridiculous example one level further, say the match between Spain and The Netherlands was the best match of the entire tournament, since the Dutch were playing to win and the Spaniards were playing their brilliant minimalist football again. Arjen Robben scored the first goal in the 14th minute, David Villa the second in the 40th, Carles Puyol the third in the 75th, and Wesley Sneijder the fourth in the 80th. In the 92nd minute, Dirk Kuyt makes the last goal of the tournament, bringing the score to 3-2 for the Netherlands. Two minutes later, the referee ends the World Cup Championship in South Africa by blowing his whistle. Although David Villa wins the award for the best player of the tournament, the jubilant Dutch national team brings home its very first World Cup Championship.

Following this triumph, on the afternoon of Tuesday, July 13, 2010, some Dutch fans decide to add orange color to the canals of Amsterdam where the Dutch national football team is being cheered on by millions of fans while they sail the canals of Amsterdam. Like 1988 when the Dutch won the European Championships, quite a few people ended up in the now orange water of the canals of Amsterdam.

Amidst the cheering, one could hear the toxicologist say, "Sirs, I do not think it is wise to jump into this orange-colored canal. I have done my calculations and I can assure you that it is dangerous to jump into this orange-colored canal. Even if the skin penetration was as low as 0.01%, you would absorb 100 kg of orange paint into your skin and would be painted orange for eternity.” But this news is simply ignored in the classical Dutch way, where rules only exist to be broken. The 16 million Dutch football supporters did not mind being orange for eternity, and even the latest Dutch immigrant jumped into the orange canals to show his/her commitment to the country.

The alternative scenario is that the Dutch would color the oceans orange to take revenge on the otherwise sympathetic and friendly Spaniards. In this case, skin penetration remains at 0.001% but with more than one million people alone in The Netherlands wanting to drown themselves in the ocean rather than waiting another 32 years to play another final, no orange dye would even be left to color the water. After all, 1,000,000 X 0.001% = 1,000%, which is 10X more than all the orange dye the Dutch used in the first place.